Click

My kids and I read the Cam Jansen series years ago - for those not familiar, she was a kid detective who had a photographic memory and all she needed to do to remember a scene would be to close her eyes and say “Click.”

There are times in my life I wish I had that ability. 

Today my third child graduates high school (even as I write that, I can’t believe I’m old enough to have three post high school age children) - and there’s a part of me that just wants to be able to freeze this day, this memory, this feeling. There are so many times in life - especially milestone times - but even regular everyday times - that I want to do that. Sitting on the hammock chilling with the kids, enjoying the lively table discussions we have these days sans any company, watching them take their first step, seeing the way they grasp a new idea. These are the moments that make it worthwhile and yet they are so fleeting.

In the chaos of everyday life and getting by, in this crazy world that is in the midst of a pandemic, it’s hard to stop and take the time to appreciate these things. And yet we should. We need to, for our own benefit.  We discussed creating the moments for them during this time where milestones are passing without the regular fanfare - but this piece is not about them. We need to focus - make a mental note, write a journal entry, mark the memory.

If we don’t make our own way to “Click”, it’ll be hard to remember it later. 

When I was in labor with my youngest child, my oldest sister came along with me for the labor and delivery. It was the first time we had anyone with us in the delivery room and to be honest,  one of my motivators was that I wanted her to force me to get an epidural since I knew my husband wouldn’t (and I HATE NEEDLES). She’s also great company and a wonderful calm. While we spent the day there, with what was actually a painless labor for the majority of the time, she wrote a letter to the baby. Recently, going through my file cabinet, I came across it and read it to my daughter (who is now 6) and it was wonderful. I wish I had one for each of the kids from their labors. It really strengthened in me this idea of marking the memory.

Most people recall the tough times easily. It’s hard to forget trauma. It’s hard to forget the struggles, the battles, the challenges we faced raising them. The good moments are easier to forget. They’re also easier to go unnoticed. Take the time to notice them. Make a point of writing them down. It’s something to turn to during the harder times. It’ll help you remember why you’re fighting so hard for them (or with them) to shape them into the amazing people they will become.

Everyone has unique ways of marking memories - scrapbooking, journals, photos - whatever way you can find to mark some of the unique moments in your life with your children - I urge you to do it. It doesn’t need to be grand or complex, a simple notebook to jot down cute things they say will do the job. You could blog about them for yourself :)

But take the time to do something so that when we’re older and it’s harder to conjure up the feelings from these special moments, you find ways to remember the good parts.