Thursday, December 3, 2020

Knee Jerk Reactions

 “When angry count to ten before you speak. If very angrycount to one hundred." - Thomas Jefferson 

I have a short thought to share today but I believe an important one. 

How often do you react instinctively to something and realize, as the words leave your mouth, that had you taken one deep breath before saying something or counted to three your response would have been very different. 

I’ve noticed this all around in life but especially with our kids (and spouses). Kids can be annoying at times and bring out the best of our knee jerk reactions - but how easy would it be to force ourselves to wait - breathe - and respond ten seconds later to whatever the situation might be? How different would our response look if we did this?

Picture the kid who is up too late and ignored bedtime - instead of a “what are you doing up?” In a snappy tone, a calm “wow I’m surprised to see you here but I always love seeing you. Now go to bed” - how different would that feel on the receiving end? 

Imagine your child is completely rude and going off on a raging tantrum about how awful you are - and instead of snapping back you breathe, tell them you love them and move on? 

It’s amazing how these reactions can diffuse even the most challenging situations. 

Breathe. Count to ten. Do your thing to give yourself the moment you need to collect yourself and respond as your best self. Leave the knee jerking to those reflex tests at the doctor!

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